Recovery: Not A Delicate Subject

Definitely not a delicate subject with me. 1st off recovery is something in my life that I never expect to have an end. There have been times I have needed to recover from my recovery! More so in the past then today because I am diligently trying to recognize the attitudes and thoughts that make me act in an unreasonable way…what works for me is not going to work for anyone besides me…one of the hardest lessons…revelation perhaps is more concise …that gives me a bit more peace in my life as I grow older…ego, self-righteous behavior, i.e. I can fix you if you will only listen syndrome…what exactly am I recovering from beside the just mentioned? 

Well, where I started it is what I call the Big “3” alcohol, drugs, and nicotine…but not without a fight! The Big “3” had a hold on me for a very long time…How long you may wonder…give me a minute…summer of 1966 was my 1st bout with both alcohol and drugs and it ended (though I did not realize at the time)  it was in March of 1999 seemed like a blink of one’s eyes…33 years of on again and off again readjusting my life to the lures getting high…I take note that I am very close, if not already there, of a ½ of life in each world…just now came to me as I was doing the math…something else to ponder… my mind is already making some conjectures on how that may have affected some of my recent decisions… subconsciously perhaps? Ahhh, I deviate from my narrative! Imagine that! Onward is the cry from the here and present!