GROWING UP
A journey of self-discovery and coming of age.
A Not So Notable Upbringing
LET ME SAY RIGHT OUT THE GATE THAT AFTER I CAME OF AGE, THAT IS KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN RIGHT AND WRONG, THE DECISIONS I MADE AND THE LIFE STYLE I CHOOSE WERE AND ARE MINE AND MINE ALONE…IT WOULD BE EASY TO BLAME ANY AND EVERYTHING ON CIRCUMSTANCES, PARENTS, FRIENDS, SOCIETY, OR ANY OTHER THINGS I COULD ADD AD NAUSEUM… WITHOUT A DOUBT THEY PLAYED A ROLE…BUT FOR ME I CHOOSE NOT TO LAY BLAME OR JUSTIFY MY WRONGS…AGAIN THAT IS ME…AND I DID NOT HAVE A HORRIBLE YOUTH THAT INVOLVED ANY PHYSICAL OR SEXUAL ABUSE…FOR WHICH I AM EXTREMELY GRATEFUL, AND THOSE OF YOU THAT DO HAVE THE SCARS AND ANGUISH THAT YOU MUST BEAR…IT IS BEYOND ME TO BE ABLE TO COMPREHEND OR TO JUDGE HOW YOU HAVE COPED WITH SUCH INSANE BEHAVIOR OF THOSE THAT DEFILED AND HURT YOU.
MY STORY BEGINS WITH THE DIVORCE OF MY PARENTS!
END OF PART 1
Forgotten Child: A Personal Account
WHEN I WAS BORN MY PARENTS GOT DIVORCED…I NEVER GOT A REASON LATER IN LIFE EVEN FROM MY OLDEST SISTER WHO I WAS VERY CLOSE WITH…ALL I GOT WAS IT WAS A STERN HOUSEHOLD TO LIVE IN…MY OLDER BROTHER BORE THE SCARS OF WHAT HE WENT THROUGH UNTIL HE DIED…BUT MY OLDEST SAID SISTER SPENT MANY YEARS WITH THE FATHER…HE WAS AN OFFICER IN THE AIR FORCE AND ACHIEVED A RANK OF LIEUTENANT COLONEL AND STATIONED IN GERMANY…ONE OUT OF 4 TO HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM IS HOW IT WORKED OUT…HOW THAT AFFECTED ME WAS LIKE THE FORGOTTEN CHILD…AS A BABY, A TODDLER, A GROWING CHILD, THE ADOLESCENCE…I HAVE NO MEMORIES OF MY MOTHER BEING A MOTHER AS THE OLDEST SIBLING MY SISTER SANDY TOOK CARE OF US ALL UNTIL I WAS 5 OR SO. MY MOTHER REMARRIED WITHIN A YEAR OF MY BIRTH WHICH WAS ACCORDING TO MY SIS (AGAIN) WAS THE LOVE OF HER LIFE…THEY HAD TWO CHILDREN RATHER QUICKLY AND THAT PUT ME IN THE FORGOTTEN CHILD ZONE FOR GOOD! MY SISTER DID HER BEST BUT BEING A YOUNG WOMAN HERSELF AND HAVING TO CARE OF 5 KIDS IS BEYOND ME…FOR THAT LOVE OF HER LIFE MAN WAS A HARD-CORE DRINKER AND SHE KEPT RIGHT UP WITH HIM. IT DID NOT TAKE LONG FOR THIS TO END IN DIVORCE ALSO AND MY MOTHER MOVED US TO AN APARTMENT THAT TURNED OUT TO BE SOME OF THE BEST YEARS FOR ALL OF US!
